Life is fragile

At church yesterday, I was holding my son in my arms trying to rock him to sleep.  Once he fell asleep I didn’t go back to my seat because he’s been not feeling well lately and wakes easily. I was worried that my sitting and ceasing rocking would wake him. So I continued to walk and bounce. Once the service ended, he was still sleeping in my arms and I proceeded to chat with some friends. At one point, his weight became apparent to me and I realized I needed to sit down.

I walked over to a seat and began to lower into the chair and then I knew…. I had pulled my back. I sat very still holding my sleeping son until my husband came near. I told him that I wouldn’t be able to stand again with Jude in my arms because my back was hurting.  So when Jude woke and it was time to pack up and leave Wado came and carried him.  Then I stood, and sheer pain ripped through me. I had done it alright, my back was locked.

That evening I did my stretches, soaked in epsom salts, and iced, iced, iced.  This morning when I woke I could barely walk… oh this body of mine!  So fragile, so easily broken.  I put a call in to my chiropractor and will be seeing her today at one o’clock. In the meantime, my husband had to call in to work because I can’t even lift my son. So here I sit, in the only chair in my house that is straight and hard (so perfect for my aching self) and I write.

You never really consider the blessing that is our health, until it is gone (albeit temporarily).  When Jude was two weeks old I began to have gallbladder attacks and so ensued the most painful four moths of my life. I can remember days of just laying on the couch watching my sister and my mom care for my baby because I could barely care for myself. Is there anything more fragile than our lives? Our health?  Most days people take for granted the most precious and fragile thing they possess. Their very breath.

My son is my God-given miracle (a long story for another day) above his crib I have this on the wall.

Jude Xavier

“For this child I have prayed and the Lord has granted the desires of my heart.” I Samuel 1:27

This verse is my reminder that his very precious life is God’s blessing to me. When we rock in his rocking chair, I pray over him, I sing praises to God for his life, and I ask for wisdom in caring for him, raising him, and ultimately guiding him in the ways of God.

Life is precious, fragile. Our very breath is God breathed – most days I take this for granted. But on days like today when I’m sitting in a chair aching and unable to even bend to pick up my son’s toys … it’s these days, I remember that this body is on loan and I need to be thankful daily for good health!

If life is a gift… why do we care for it so loosely? Why do we daily gripe and complain, when everything of importance is a precious gift? We can do nothing to earn life…. it is simply handed to us.  When we are given gifts (birthday/christmas etc) do we not glow with thankfulness and pleasure and thank the giver of the gift over and over? Then we care for that gift. We treat it with the utmost  of care, because it was a gift so it’s more special than had we simply purchased it ourselves.

I know that I have troubles with my back. This is not the first time I’ve put it out.  I know what i need to do to strengthen it and care for it.  Do I ?  Sure , when it’s troubling me. But when i feel good and healthy?  I forget completely that I need to continue building it up and strengthening it to protect from further issues.

It’s like the parent who insists her child wear sunscreen, a hat and drink plenty of fluids when outdoors in the sun, but neglects her own care.

Or the mother who prepares a healthy lunch for her kids and for herself? She’s lucky to get a glass of water.

We treat our bodies with very little regard especially considering the fragility of them and their unique value.

Today, let’s stop and consider how valuable our bodies/lives are. Be thankful for our health and look to care for it more deliberately.



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